Families can do more harm than good. In situations cluttered with emotional and cultural complexities, the family way is often the wrong way.

This was especially the case when my client had lived for some time separated from the family either geographically or emotionally or, usually, both. With the news of the fatal illness, the family tendency was to sweep in and take over. Friends and even lovers were brushed aside as they, after all, had been responsible for his lifestyle and hence his illness, hadn’t they? If only he had he stayed in the bosom of his family, all this would never have happened. Or so the feeling went.

Sometime the family’s behavior was overt, even cruel, sometimes more subtle, through hints and innuendo. Always, there was the underlying, irrefutable implication that blood is thicker than water.